EMPTY VESSELS

You want to speak do you, to say something.
Do you really think that you have something worthwhile to say, something that I would want to hear.
Are you that stupid?
Have you not listened to a word I have said to you?
You have no opinion that is worth voicing, no-one wants to hear what you have to say.
Oh yes, you have tried, I grant you that, and where did it get you eh, just where did it get you?
I have told you time and time again, you do as you are told and everything would have been fine.
Now look at you, sat here in this room full of misfits. Yes, that is what I said, misfits.
People who have to be locked away from society because they are a disgrace, should have been drowned at birth.
Mental institution, no, we don’t need those, just get rid of them.
Do you know how much it has taken for me to come here today, and you mark my words my girl, this will be the only visit I make to this place.
A child of mine, a throwback, that is what you are a mental throwback.
I have done nothing to deserve the disgrace you have brought upon me and your family. 'Can’t cope', you have no idea of what ‘a hard life is’.
I have provided for you since the day you were born, put a roof over your head, food on the table and you repay me like this. I
should have insisted that she had a termination, that is what I should have done, insisted, then I would not be sat here now.

Where is who, Oh, he's gone nurse, left. Well not really left because he had to be here to leave and he never has been. Not really and yet he has always been here, not here with what I needed, but here with what I didn’t, if you know what I mean. It would be funny if it were not so sad.
I feel sorry for him and yet I can’t feel sorry for myself, I feel guilty. Yes guilty, I want him to be happy, to be proud of me. I want to say something that would please him. Talk too much rubbish, that is why he doesn’t listen, it’s OK, he told me too, that I just talk about trash, he does not need to know how I feel, I just need to know how to behave.
Now I cannot utter a single word without hearing him say it will be worthless, a waste of words. So I don’t speak anymore, that is what started all this, why my wrists look like barbed wire, why I can stare and not see. I don’t want any more pills nurse, please no more pills.

Sorry, what did you say? A walk, outside, really, in the grounds, amongst the autumn leaves, do you really have the time, for me, really …
Nurse, that saying on the wall, the one over there look, by the window. It says ‘Empty vessels make the loudest noise’ Would that mean him or me?